The Wellness You Would Not Know is Wellness

Hi Friends,

I was taking a walk by myself the other night and looked up at the sky. For some reason, I had this incredible urge to see the sun setting from higher ground. So, I picked up my pace and wandered to a nearby parking lot that had rooftop parking. I bolted up the stairs and caught a glimpse of the pink and orange and yellow sky just before it faded.

It was exhilarating! I was genuinely in awe. Every sunset is one of one. And as much as we might know and expect the sun to rise and set, there is something magic in it when we stop to notice.

Not just the sky but what surrounds us - the colors, the sounds, the smells. Nature.

I noticed how I felt having seen nature’s grand “Goodnight.”

I was calm. I was content - not up or down but steady. And I wss connected - to myself, my surroundings and the present moment. Maybe I even breathed a little deeper.

It got me to think about how wellness “behaviors” often fall into the categories of nutrition, exercise and sleep or supplementation. Boxes to check. And I love those boxes!

But, maybe some of the things that are best for our health don’t look like “wellness” behaviors at all?

Some of these behaviors don’t involve counting calories, hitting a step goal, lifting heavier weights, measuring your waist, or getting a perfect sleep score.

They might look more like climbing a parking lot staircase to catch a glimpse of the falling sun.

Saying, out loud, “I’m proud of myself,” because you finally folded the laundry. (I did this too this week!)

Or taking a pottery class with your girlfriends simply because you’ve never done it before. (Yes, check.)

These things may not seem connected to wellness—but they are.

Health isn’t just about what we eat or how we exercise. It’s also about the state of our nervous system, our sense of connection, our confidence in ourselves, and how much joy and meaning we experience in our everyday lives.

Notice what’s beautiful.

When was the last time you actually stopped to watch the sunset? Or just notice the clouds in the sky?

Research on being in nature has found associations with lower perceived and physiologic stress, including changes in measures such as heart rate variability (HRV), which offers a look into how our nervous system is responding to stress.

In other words, taking a moment to appreciate beauty may be doing more than giving you that calm and contented feeling - which is actually pretty good anyway!

Noticing nature and the beauty that surrounds us may be giving your nervous system a chance to slow down, regulate, and recover.

And that matters.

Because resilience is not the absence of stress. It is the ability to move through stress and return to a more regulated state.

Celebrate the small wins.

This one might feel silly.

But try saying, “I’m proud of myself,” after you do something small.

Finished the laundry.

Cleaned the kitchen.

Made the appointment you’ve been putting off.

Why would we celebrate something so ordinary?

Because confidence isn’t built only by accomplishing big things.

It’s built through repeated experiences of I said I would—and I did.

These are the moments that give ourselves evidence that we are trustworthy - And, that we can do hard things. (Yes, laundry at the end of the day is hard!)

Further, it is this confidence in ourselves that generates momentum.

The person who practices following through on small things is building the same internal muscle he/she/they will need when the challenge gets bigger.

Showing up for the fitness class when she’d rather stay home.

Going to bed early instead of scrolling for another hour.

Making a different choice with food.

Small wins may not seem like a big deal from the outside. They may seem insignificant. But small change the way we see ourselves. And when we see ourselves as winning, it changes what we are capable of doing next.

Try something new—and do it with people you love.

Lastly, on a whim, I went to a sculpt-and-sip night with some girlfriends a while back.

I had never done anything like it before, and honestly, that was part of the fun.

I wasn’t trying to get better at anything.

I wasn’t trying to burn calories.

I wasn’t trying to optimize my health.

I was simply trying something new with people I enjoy.

And that is wellness, too.

Our brains benefit from new experiences and learning. The adult brain remains able to change and learn new things! You have probably heard of plasticity, meaning that new demands and learning can stimulate adaptations in the brain. Research on novelty also suggests that new experiences can support improved memory.

And then there is the social piece.

We sometimes treat time with friends as something we have to squeeze in after we’ve taken care of everything else.

But connection isn’t extra.

Strong social relationships are consistently associated with better health and longevity independent of other factors.

So maybe wellness sometimes looks like taking the pottery class.

Going to dinner with your girlfriends.

Learning how to make something you’ve never made before.

Laughing until your stomach hurts.

Being a beginner.

These things don’t directly change your body composition.

They don’t necessarily increase your step count.

They aren’t going to show up on your nutrition tracker.

(Your wellness coach might not even ask about them.)

But they can change the experience of your life.

Aside from living from a regulated state, which impacts digestion, well-being, mental and emotional health and in a downstream effect, the choices we make, these things build joy and meaning into life.

Our Oura rings and Cronometers may look like we are living perfectly, but if we do not have joy or moments of awe and connection, have we fully embraced what life can be?

We are meant to feel the sun, wonder at the sound of a friend’s laughter and rejoice in what is good!

Because no matter our weight, no matter what we ate, no matter how well we slept—

these are the days of our lives. Each day is one of one.

And wellness isn’t just about making our bodies healthier.

It’s about making the experience of living in those bodies better.

With you on the journey,
Molly